Metal on Ice: Misery Index on the Washington Capitals

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AS THE WASHINGTON CAPITALS' popularity has increased in the area, a subgenre of fans has emerged within the hordes rocking the red: D.C.- and Baltimore-area metal musicians sporting the local hockey team's logos (new and old), writing theme songs, and big uppin' the likes of Alexander Ovechkin, Mike Green and the rest of the District's charismatic pro puckheads in interviews.

Last year, Darkest Hour wrote a playoff anthem for D.C. ("Let's Go Caps!") and Pummeler weighed in with a couple of jams ("Ovechkin" and "Crosby Sucks"). Rose Funeral is based out of Cincinnati, but guitarist Ryan Gardner is from Parkville, Md., and he sports the Caps' defunct dome logo on his personal MySpace page. And Baltimore's Behold the Flood flies the new eagle on its MySpace, while Bethesda's Periphery has scripted its name like the Captials' logo.

But the metal band doing the most day-to-day grunt work to support the Caps is the Baltimore-Silver Spring four-piece Misery Index. Guitarist Sparky Voyles can usually be found sporting one of his many Caps or Hershey Bears jerseys on stage — often tailoring what he wears to provoke the crowd if he's in a rival town, or to pay compliments to a current Caps player who made time in other cities (i.e., he dons Donald Brasher gear in Philly, Montreal and Vancouver).

Like Misery Index bassist-vocalist Jason Netherton, Voyle has been going to games since the early 1980s, living and dying with every Capitals playoff heartbreaker.

But being in an extreme metal/punk band that's pretty much on a constant worldwide tour — currently in support of a killer new album, "Traitor" (Relapse) — makes it difficult to catch all the games. Yet Voyles is so hardcore that he listens to games on Sirius-XM satellite radio, logs onto the Internet to read blogs about the Caps from whatever far-flung location Misery Index has landed, and has his mom tape many of the games (yes, tape — on VHS) so he can watch them when he returns from the road.

Voyles and Netherton are a little disappointed to be hitting the road for three weeks straight just as the Caps start their playoff run, but Misery Index is relieved that the jaunt takes them through hockey-crazed Canada.

But if the Caps go deep into the playoffs — to the Stanley Cup finals, for instance — Misery Index will be gigging in Japan (and then Europe), and access to watching and following puck will become very difficult.

Express Night Out correspondent "Mistress CP" — who tried to replace Mistress Julia on Fuse's "Uranium" but didn't look nearly as good in leatherettes — caught up with Voyles and Netherton to discuss the Caps after Misery Index's recent show at the Rock and Roll Hotel. The video was shot on H Street in Washington, D.C., at 1:30 a.m. on April 15.