B-Sides, the Point: Morrissey, 'Swords'

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DO YOU THINK MORRISSEY ever gets sick and tired of being ... well, so sick and tired?

That's not to suggest that the English Master of Mope is getting old in the age-sense (even though he turned the big 5-0 this year). Rather, it's to inquire whether the man who once fronted The Smiths ever gets bored of complaining about loveless relationships and societal woes. If so, you won't find any of that evolution on his latest album, "Swords" — the 18-song collection of B-sides from Morrissey's three most recent albums veers between pleasantly formulaic and boringly unexceptional.

If you're down with that woe-is-the-world scenario, though, then most of this album will appeal to your glass-half-empty mentalities. If not, take your optimism elsewhere.

Gathered from 2004's "You Are the Quarry," 2006's "Ringleader of the Tormenters" and this past February's "Years of Refusal," the songs on "Swords" run the gamut from the lushly orchestral to the sparsely sentimental, but they all focus on Morrissey's push-and-pull relationship with love, the most pesky emotion of all (surprising to no one, obvi). Whether he's focusing on the (lack of) love between a father and his distanced children, a relationship mired in a constant quarrel or someone with raging self-esteem issues, Morrissey's got something snarky to say about all of it — and jeez, does he still wield that disdainful edge.

Things start off with "Good Looking Man About Town," the B-side from "You Have Killed Me," the first single from "You Are the Quarry." Driven by a rhythm that seems straight out of an Indian sitar session, the song mixes South Asian sounds with frenetic guitars as Morrissey mocks, "You got your degree, then you flew to Mars / But you still feel wretched because / You'll never be naked with / A good-looking man about town." Though the lyrics are typical Morrissey, the instrumentation provides a globally friendly flair that grabs your attention (and certainly won't remind anyone of The Smiths' ax man Johnny Marr).

Unfortunately, though, the album can't keep that kind of momentum going — there's no natural evolution or progression here, as a regular album would have, because this release isn't one. Instead, as a collection of random tracks, "Swords" jumps from place to place and ends up being extremely hit-or-miss. For example, "Don't Make Fun of Daddy's Voice" (the B-side to single "Let Me Kiss You," also from "You are the Quarry") is amazingly bizarre, beginning with an electronic-heavy instrumental freakout and containing only a few lyrics, the most repeated being, "Don't make fun of Daddy's voice / Because he can't help it / When he was a teenage boy / Something got stuck in his throat."

In comparison, "I Knew I Was Next" employs a weirdly jazzy, big-band sound (think the Boss) while Morrissey talks about how he's only "a decent skin" and wonders if people will finally praise him when he's in his grave. Huh? Dude, the Mexicans love you! Don't you remember that SPIN story — "Viva Morrissey!" — Chuck Klosterman wrote about you in August 2002?

Anyway, the songs that really work best are the ones that thrust Morrissey back into his comfort zone of achingly depressed lyrics and luxuriously epic instrumentation. "If You Don't Like Me, Don't Look at Me" couples a quietly building swell of guitars and pianos with a calmly disdainful Morrissey urging the lover who jilted him to "see if I care, see if I care, see if I care." Similarly good is "My Dearest Love," which is built around a simple, solid bass line and is indicative of where bands like The Fray and Travis get all their ideas.

And the best is "Christian Dior," during which Morrissey compares himself to the legendary fashion designer, lamenting how they both wasted their lives perfecting a craft instead of being "reckless and legless and stoned / Impregnating women / Or kissing mad street boys from Napoli / Who couldn't even write their own name." Though all the songs are somewhat expected, they're also comfortable — kind of like the well-worn, still-cozy old sweatshirt of British rock.

There are a lot of other things going on here — for example, Morrissey gets political with tracks like "Ganglord," "Shame is the Name," "Munich Air Disaster," "Teenage Dad on His Estate" and "Because of My Poor Education," which touch on things like police corruption, political strife and the ignorant masses — but you'd be best to take "Swords" one song at a time. It's the best way to embrace the Moz's gloom and skip over his missteps.

After all, Morrissey's seen better days. Just not happier ones.

Written by Express contributor Roxana Hadadi
Image courtesy Girlie Action