NOT BEING ABLE TO squeeze into a pair of jeans is annoying. Being dead is way worse. That's the idea behind "Could You Survive?" (debuts Thursday at 9 p.m. on Discovery Health), a program that puts out-of-shape folks in disaster scenarios — earthquakes, car accidents, burning buildings — to show them that their habits have potentially fatal consequences. Then physician/nutrition expert/superwoman Pam Peeke, author of "Fit to Live," and her team of gruff Marine Corps trainers spring into action, teaching participants diet and fitness fixes. A month later, the participants get something they never would in the real world: a second chance.

» EXPRESS: Why is this more motivating than appearance or health?
» PEEKE: Everyone wants to live. The frosting on the cake is really when we bring in other people. What if you were trying to save the life of a loved one and because you didn't have what it took, you couldn't? In the burning building episode, Dennis couldn't reach the top of the building. He looked up, his face covered in sweat, and he said, "If I were with my family right now, I'd have to say, 'Go on without me.'" It was a huge wake-up call.

» EXPRESS: How important is the mental aspect of all this?
» PEEKE: It's huge. People often have that early confidence, but after the fourth flight of stairs, they give up. But when you practice and work hard like the people on the show, now they have confidence that's based on experience.

My boyfriend and I are 27, have been together for three years and have lived together for two. Before we moved in together, he told me he wasn't ready for marriage but could see himself marrying me. We're still nowhere near an engagement. He has a laundry list of reasons — too young, none of his friends are married, etc. I recently asked whether he thought he'd be ready to get engaged in a year. He got upset, so we agreed to revisit in a year. I believe that it's not that he's not ready, but that he's not sure I am "the one." I'm beginning to emotionally "check out." How long is reasonable for me to wait for him? — Anonymous

These questions are tough because personality factors determine people's notions of being ready and finding "the one." There are those who knew within an hour that they'd met their match, and there are those who still second-guess those socks they bought two weeks ago. Naturally, if a couple have different styles, it can bring complications.

But the most you can do is to take this one day at a time. Your relationship is only as good as it is in the present. You're checking out; he's coming up with excuses that sound a little off-point (None of his friends are married? Puh-lease.) It seems that both of you aren't being completely honest with each other.

You're resentful because you feel like you're more invested than he is — an awful place to be. Until he can convince you that it's really a matter of when rather than who, that won't go away. But you've got to think hard about whether you're convince-able. Proposal by ultimatum seems about as romantic — and prudent — as proposal by enema. Your task is to figure out whether he — this very evening, ringless and with only his words to let you know how he feels — is enough.

THE BEST PRESENT folks can wake up to on Christmas morning after more than a month of pumpkin pie eating and eggnog swilling is something to make them feel like active elves again. Whether they're training for a marathon, taking up yoga, considering bike commuting, planning the ultimate family camping trip or just trying to increase their exercise level, everyone could use a push to get going. (Even Santa! You might stuff your face at the company holiday party, but Santa has to make up for millions of cookies.) And if none of these 10 choices is a winner for any of the names on your list, don't forget that experiential gifts can be goodies, too. Rock-climbing classes, dance class gift cards, ski getaways and race entrance fees are sure to make the season brighter, and lighter, for fitness fanatics.

» To Have and to Fold
The Dahon MU P8 might not fit inside a stocking, but the bike does collapse into a manageable bundle that makes commuting on two wheels a cinch. After a ride to work, just store it under your desk. But expect jealous stares from your co-workers. ($560, Amazon.com)
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» Hipper Sipper
Outside it may be cold and nasty, but it's always spring on this floral-patterned aluminum water bottle. Plus, it looks like a much-more-expensive Sigg, although it's perfectly priced for office secret Santas. ($13, Gaiam.com)
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The concept is simple: A central game unit with air-filled pods sticking out of it commands players to jump around. Some of its orders correspond with stomping on certain colors, and others target numbers or require calculations (addition and subtraction). And every now and then, it'll yell out "crisscross," a double jump with a twist, which is more about agility than smarts. If it sounds a bit like high-speed Twister with math problems thrown in, it sort of is — for certain moves, you'll do better if you use all four limbs.

The only downside we found was that for older children (Read: Express writers), a big jump can cause the pods to fly off, which is a pain. But for the wee ones the game is actually meant for, the pieces should hold up better. And, certainly, players' bodies and brains will, too.

Photo courtesy Hyper Jump

IT'S THAT TIME OF YEAR again—extra traffic, extra stuffing, and extra ads about a 4 a.m. sale on leather gloves.

But once again, especially in this time of economic turmoil, it also becomes important to give some thought to the meaning of Thanksgiving. No, not just the historically dubious notion of a harmonious, gut-busting gathering of buckled hats and feathered vests, but the fact that taking a moment to reflect on what there is to be grateful for in one’s life can actually have quite a positive outcome on someone’s mental health.

I've written before about the beneficial health effects of taking time to express gratitude. This year, however, it might seem more difficult than most. People are identifying higher stress levels in their lives now than they have in a long time: the added suffering is real. But the harder it is to think about all of the positive aspects of our lives, the more important it is that we do so. The worse we feel, the more we can use the mental help that a bit of being thankful can provide.

BY DAY, ANGELITA THOMAS is a professional stage manager for theater companies around town. But at night, she's "fresh meat."

That's what the DC Rollergirls, the city's only roller derby league, call newbie skaters hoping to join their ranks on the track.

Miniskirted women skating at top speed, screaming and shoving each other in an effort to advance at all costs? Yep, that's roller derby. Rules keep the game from being super-violent, but jutting hips and shoulders make it plenty physical.

Wear it on a necklace, clip it to your bra or use the enclosed stickers to attach it directly to your skin. Then the teeny microchip inside the disc can determine whether you're tilting or slouching, and it buzzes to remind you to perk up. Luckily, it waits for 60 seconds of bad behavior before activating, so it's not constantly complaining if you're moving around.

We decided to take it on a walk to the Museum of Natural History and found we actually managed to keep our spines quite straight. (Only an extended bend to look at that giant squid caused a vibration.) When we returned home and sat down at our computer, however, it was buzz city. So, we have some issues, but there was just one thing wrong with the device — when we peeled it off our skin, we were left with an iPosture hickey.

Photo Courtesy iPosture

But bulk up on the bounty of the earth as the Pilgrims once did — that means lose the marshmallows — and you'll actually be able to get up after dinner, says Isabel Clark of D.C.-based Clark Wellness (Clarkwellness.net).

Her strategy for a healthier holiday meal starts with giving classic sides an "upgrade." "It's not just making the same dish but with low-fat sour cream. It's instead of serving sweet potato casserole, making a mélange of roasted root vegetables," she says.

PERHAPS IT WAS SAN FRANCISCO'S love of carb-heavy Rice-A-Roni products that did it in. Because in SELF Magazine's 9th Annual America's Best Places for Women survey — released today — the reigning champ was knocked to second place by Bethesda, Md. Features director Sara Austin wasn't surprised by the suburb's impressive showing. It's the first year the area was ranked separately from D.C. (which, along with Alexandria and Arlington, came in at a very respectable 15 out of 100 cities). "It's a combination of smart habits and good resources," she says, noting such factors as low rates of disease and access to health clubs.

Bethesda has the least unemployment and the most doctors per capita (it can't hurt to have the National Institutes of Health in its territory). Residents are also the second least stressed (after Cambridge, Mass.), and spend their days in the second-healthiest workplaces (after Seattle, Wash.). After all, a winner needs high marks across the board.

Not that all's perfect in Montgomery County. "We all have our health bugaboos to work on," Austin adds. Bethesda's rates of STDs were above average, and while it gets kudos in the magazine for being a commuter's heaven — thanks to Metro and the Capital Crescent Trail — the average round-trip work commute of one hour, 12 minutes represents a big chunk of the day. Better get working on that for next year to keep San Francisco in its place.

OUTSIDER RIDER
» Landroller Mojo

The Verdict: With two cartoonishly large wheels mounted at an angle, it's easier to roll over cracks and bumps in city pavement. They're fast and smooth but take some getting used to before your ankles stop wobbling and your shins stop aching. If you stick with it, you'll use leg muscles you never knew you had. ($199.95, Landroller.com)

TRIED & TRUE
» Rollerblade Spark

The Verdict: This model (available for men and women) is great for rookie skaters because of its low center of gravity and a comfy boot that keeps ankles fairly stable. Plus, it's easy to maneuver around corners and it weighs a quarter-pound less than its predecessor. A new asymmetrical lacing feature helps the boot fit the shape of your foot. ($189.99, Summitonline.com)