AUGUST IS A LONG WAY from January, when "American Idol" will once again cartwheel into our living rooms like a hyperactive 6-year-old. But when the show does return, there'll be a new head added to the three-headed judging monster that's served the show well for seven seasons.
Joining Randy, Simon and Paula will be singer/songwriter Kara DioGuardi!
[*sound of crickets chirping*]
You know, Kara DioGuardi, the hitmeistress behind songs for artists as varied as Ashlee Simpson, the Jonas Brothers the Backstreet Boys and Nick Lachey, boasting a discography that would fall under the "Jeopardy!" category "Songs Non-Tweens Violently Despise."
Yeah, I had to Google her, too.
The Fox suits were gosh, golly pleased as punch! to have DioGuardi join the show, and not just because they want to watch with bemused grins as Paula tries to slurringly pronounce her name.
THERE COMES A TIME in every reviewer's life when he must stand up and take his medicine.
Today's my day.
It's no fun to blog about a competition like "American Idol" without inserting some opinion, analysis and educated guesses into the mix. And my repeated strong assertions this week that David Archuleta would emerge the victor this season just go to show how flimsy even the most earnest attempt at an educated guess can be.
With a large slice of humble pie in hand, I present to you the season's final edition of Idol Chatter, wherein everyone who disagreed with me is proven right.
Mmmmm. Pie.
— GB
THIS IS IT. As the camera focuses in on the stage at the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles, we see what this competition — the months and weeks of rehearsals and broadcasts and prep, prep, prep — has come down to: two guys named David wearing white outfits and staring at each other.
One will go away this season's American Idol. The other will just go away.
Aaaaaand go on tour. And then probably release an album. And then guide his career wherever it may go.
Still, this broadcast is the final reveal in a contest that's shown us some stirring victories and agonizing defeats, but most of all, it's been a season most characterized by stunningly talented people who just couldn't bring those gifts to bear when it counted most.
We'll see plenty of them tonight. But first, we're stuck looking at Seacrest, who crows about Tuesday night's vote tally.
"You won't believe what has happened," he exclaims. "If every single person in Canada, Spain, Ireland and Australia voted last night, it still would not have matched our incredible vote. Here's the number: 97 and a half million votes came in. You didn't just break the record for the show, you smashed it by over 23 million."
How'd that ginormous slice of Americana break down? Seacrest's kind enough to tell us.
"One David received 56 percent of the vote," he says. "The other David received 44 percent."
Wow. That's a pretty clear win.
Continue Reading "Cook's Special: David Cook Wins 'American Idol'" »
THE PERFORMANCES ARE OVER. Now comes America's big choice: Which David will be this year's American Idol?
Did Li'l David Archuleta run away with Tuesday night's performance show as the judges suggested? Or will David Cook gallop toward a dark horse victory?
Express' Greg Barber discusses all things "Idol" today at 11 a.m.
THE GLOVES ARE OFF. The season's two seemingly untouchable heavyweights — David Cook and Li'l David Archuleta — are finally going head to head, toe to toe and vocal chord to vocal chord to determine which of them will attain fame and fortune as the bona fide American Idol and which of them will ... well, probably attain fame and fortune anyway.
But the title! It's important! Or so we're told.
The clash of these two titans begins in the best way it possibly can: without Seacrest. It's a little skit in which David and Li'l David show up in boxing outfits (which, of course, means the gloves are briefly on) as the "Let's Get Ready to Rumble™" guy introduces them.
Some observations:
» David Cook is a funny man. And weighs 180 pounds, apparently? One too many trips to In-N-Out Burger, hmm?
» Li'l David is very, very small. My kid brother looked more menacing in his faux WWF championship belt when he was 7 years old.
» The "Let's Get Ready to Rumble™" guy punches "THIS is 'American Idol'" even more heavily than Seacrest does, which I didn't think was possible. Surprisingly, it was considerably less annoying.
But then, of course, Secrest appears, hamming it up before an expanded audience of thousands at L.A.'s Nokia Theatre. And that's when the real drama begins.
"It's all come down to this," he says in a voiceover accompanying a taped introduction to the night's festivities. "Two men with one name and one desire: to be crowned champion."
The boxing motif gets very old very quickly. And not to be a total word nerd here, but the two men don't actually have one name. Two women with one name would be Cher and Madonna. They're two men who share a first name.
I'm an editor. These things bother me as much as Metrorail operators who say "Judic-U-ary Square" instead of "Judiciary Square" over Red Line loudspeakers. Just one "u." Not two. Thanks.
Ancient record exec Clive Davis — I'm sure he's got amazing stories to tell about playing pinochle with William McKinley — and still-creepy former "Idol" mentor Andrew Lloyd Webber offer obvious advice and praise. Jim Lampley (huh?) babbles boxing advice. And the Davids are made to assume fighting poses. Which proves beyond a doubt that both are lovers, not fighters.
How did they prepare for the big night?
» Li'l David: "Well, you know, just rehearsed as much you could and whenever you have the spare time to. ... I feel pretty ready; I feel as ready as I could."
» David C.: "Well, I mean, for me, it just started out — I've got a tall order in front of me trying to keep up with this kid. For me, it's just trying to find the right energy for each of these songs, and hopefully you guys'll oblige."
Advice from the judges?
» Randy: "I think tonight, you guys both have to leave everything on the floor. You gotta bring everything that you've got tonight. This is a duel, Ryan, for the king of the Nokia. ... Drop it, dude, drop it hard tonight!"
» Paula: "You're at the Nokia Theatre where everybody is loving you. So enjoy it, soak it up, and may the best man win."
» Simon: "You know, you've got to have a desire to win, and you've got to hate your opponent."
These guys don't seem to be bringing the hate. But which will bring the better show?
THEY'VE GOT THE SAME first name, a high level of fan support and unquestionably well-honed pipes.
Beyond that, "American Idol" finalists David Archuleta and David Cook couldn't be more different.
Take their all-important song choices. The 17-year-old Archuleta has carved out a niche as a pint-sized balladeer. He wowed fans and critics with John Lennon's "Imagine" and "Angels" by Robbie Williams but fell flat with preachy fare like Phil Collins' "Another Day in Paradise."
His most disastrous moment: forgetting the words to The Beatles' "We Can Work It Out."
Cook, 25, is best known for using tweaks in arrangement to put new spins on popular songs. His versions of Lionel Richie's "Hello," Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean" and The Beatles' "Eleanor Rigby" were particular crowd-pleasers.
His Achilles' heel? When he doesn't live up to his own hype. His bungled version of Duran Duran's "Hungry Like the Wolf" and his flatline take on "Dare You to Move" by Switchfoot were low-water marks -- the most recent of which took place just last week.
Their backgrounds are different, too. Cook released an indie album, but had recently been working as a bartender. Archuleta's a high schooler -- who also happened to win Star Search at the tender age of 12.
Both Davids are treated to high-pitched screams when they amble onstage. And neither has officially wound up at the back of the pack in the "Idol" weekly voting tally.
Continue Reading "Davids at Dusk: Archuleta, Cook to Face Off" »
WANT TO SEE David Cook arrange, David Archuleta emote, Carly Smithson belt and Ramiele Malubay do ... whatever it is she does? Then, Saturday's your day! It's the day that tickets to the "American Idols Live" tour go on sale across the country.
Thrill! to the kick-butt Beatles covers by Chikezie. Swoon! as Jason Castro beams his baby-blues your direction. Puzzle! over the appeal of Brooke White. The whole Top 10 will be there. Even Kristy Lee Cook.
The tour is sponsored by Pop Tarts, which I thought was a description of the Idolites rather than a sponsor at first glance. This relationship clearly was not checked out by Fox's Department of Irony.
Our homeboys and -girls in the D.C. area will have two chances to catch the Idols — both in the middle of the week, sadly: at the 1st Mariner Arena in Baltimore on Tuesday, Aug. 12, and right downtown at the Verizon Center on Thursday, Aug. 14. Tickets for both are available starting at 10 a.m.
Our friends across the country can check the handy list below, ganked from americanidol.com. It includes the date, city and venue for each show and the local time at which tickets go on sale.
Enjoy.
Continue Reading "'American Idols Live' Tickets On Sale Saturday" »
Express' Greg Barber recaps the ousting of Syesha Mercado on "American Idol."
EVEN THOUGH the contestants won't be competing, it's clear from the buzz in the air and the clamor in the audience that this "American Idol" results broadcast will be more action-packed than most.
The show starts with a whip around the audience, and, oh, the "Idol" luminaries we see! Ex-contestants Michael Johns, Brooke White, Kristy Lee Cook and Ramiele Malubay! And former mentor Andrew Lloyd Webber!
And then it's cleavage-o-rama as the judges are introduced. Paula's girls are out for a night on the town — and don't get me started about the anatomical weirdness that her necklace engenders. Yikes.
And then there's Simon, who looks like he mugged a maitre d' on his way in, stole his shirt, then ripped off the top buttons. His outfit shows off much more of his chestal area than I would ever really want to see.
For the group sing, three very lonely looking Idolites — David Archuleta, David Cook and Syesha Mercado — strut out to sing the ironically titled "Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now." Which is funny, of course, since one of them will be stopped dead in their tracks tonight.
Hey, more former Idolites! Jason Castro! Amanda Overmyer and her hair! Chikezie! David Hernandez! It's strange how long it seems since we've seen some of them, doesn't it?
Express' Greg Barber on the fortunes of David Archuleta, David Cook and Syesha Mercado as they sing for their supper on "American Idol."
CAN YOU FEEL IT? That extra tension in the air? That twinge of anticipation? That little jolt of electricity like winter static?
Yeah, I'm happy the rain in D.C. finally ended, too. Oh, and "American Idol!" It's the second-to-last week!
Three contestants are left: the juggernauts who've rumbled through the season with nary a bump in the road and the battle-scarred fighter who's clawed her way up from the trenches and has so far lived to tell the tale.
Where once we had dozens of hopefuls splayed out before us like quacking ducklings in a pond, only David Archuleta, David Cook and Syesha Mercado remain.
The stakes, they are high.
"This is it," says Seacrest as he opens the show. "It is a pivotal moment in the lives of our three finalists. The way they perform and the way you respond can truly affect the closest race this show has ever seen."
No pressure, right?
The contestants are set to perform three songs each: one they selected, one the judges picked and one the mighty producers chose from their thrones of darkness blanketed in shadow.
Over the weekend, the Top 3 contestants flew back to their hometowns to be fawned over. That's also where they received the judges' song choice.
Our first stop: Murray City, Utah.
WE KNOW THEIR NAMES: David Archuleta, David Cook and Syesha Mercado. And tonight, we get to look at their numbers to see which one of them won't make next week's "American Idol" finale.
Until then, though, there's much to discuss.
Which Top 3 contestants will make it to the finals? Who did the best job during last night's performances? And what about this stage dad dust-up involving Li'l David's father?
Join Express' Greg Barber to discuss all this and more today at 11 a.m.
I CAN'T RESIST diving into the flurry of stories that've shuffled out over the past few days about Li'l David Archuleta's dad, Jeff.
Here's the news nugget: Remember last week when Li'l David, in the midst of his performance of "Stand By Me" by Ben E. King, warbled something about "all you beyouuuutiful girls"? No surprise, he did it on purpose. According to The New York Times, among many, many others, the line is a snippet from a song by Sean Kingston that Li'l D and his dad, who helps David arrange his songs, were warned not to use. David sang the lyrics anyway, which meant that "Idol" had to fork over extra cash for rights clearances and royalties.
The dust-up, according to the Times and others, got Papa Archuleta banned from the show's rehearsals.
But Li'l David's vocal coach, Dean Kaelin, says the news media has the story wrong. He tells The Salt Lake Tribune's Vince Horiuchi that Jeff Archuleta was told not to help his son arrange songs for "fairness," not because of a spat with producers:
"This whole thing with the words is ludicrous," said Kaelin, who has been working with David and his father during the show's run. "[David] easily would have sung that in front of producers, directors [during rehearsals]. Why wouldn't anyone go up to him and say, 'You can't sing that,' or go to Jeff? And nobody did." ..."I have spoken to Jeff about all of this, and what he said to me is he is not 'banned' from the show," Kaelin said. "What he was banned from — and I wouldn't even call it that — is from the arranging sessions."
Continue Reading "Idol Chatter: For Archuleta, All the World's a Stage Dad" »
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